There’s a trick to eating at the school dining halls. You can’t just dive into the halls thinking everything is tasty, first you have to find out if it’s even edible. Always look at your options before filling your plate! Never expect there to be a good meal waiting for you. Don’t think that all of the dishes are bad, some may actually be good. It may be scary or frustrating going down the stairs to the dining halls because you won’t always know what is good or bad to eat. “Will I get the shits today or will I actually make it out alive?” you continually ask yourself at each meal. Well, Eating at the dining halls is a delicate procedure and in my three and a half years of eating in the halls, I’ve figured out a system.
Step 1: PROWL
Look at all your options. You have your pizza, the grill (with frozen hamburger patties, fries, turkey burgers, and tuna melts), the alternatives, the main course options, and the different sides. There are other food stations that are good alternatives such as the salads, soups, wraps and gourmet cooked food. Foods that you can't really go wrong in when cooking. My advice is to not rely on these everyday because you will tire from it and will be left hungry,with no other options.
*Note: During breakfast, there are freshly made omelets that are usually
well prepared but usually has a long waiting line.
Step 2: INSPECT
There are many options to choose from, but that doesn’t mean they are all tasty or edible. Look at what is offered and inspect the quality. Check if the fries are too burnt, check if the hamburger patties look like imitation meat, check if the pizza is sloppy, and check if the pasta is dark and dry or white and soggy. As for the main course, see if the veggies are too soggy and the meat too dry.
*Advice: For dry meats, try to get the bottom pieces ad dip it in its own
gravy before putting it on your plate. Also for future references, remember who
is making the food. If a student worker is at the grill or pizza station,
you might want to pass.
Step 3: HUNT-OR-GATHER
Depending on if you are a vegetarian or a meat-eater, you either hunt or gather your food. If you’re an omnivore you can do both, no problem. Either way you need to be careful of what you choose and ask yourself, “is this food supposed to look or smell like this?” Always watch out for the lunch ladies. They tend to say what is on their minds quite freely. Take your plate and reach as close to the pas as much as possible. Try not to spill anything or you may anger the "lunch lady" beasts. Don’t take too much meat in front of the full line of hungry people, do it while they are looking away. Some of these lunch people may look like criminals but they can be very kind if you show them respect.
*Advice: Getting in good with food-staff has its benefits. I befriended two, and
at times get free swipes and am advised of what is good to eat for the day.
Step 4: TASTE
If the food looks good enough to eat, check for poison. Just kidding, but do try the food with caution first. The vegetarian meals tend to be salty, anything considered an Asian dish may be salty, chicken with the bones may still be too pink, and the marinara may sometimes be off or taste different. But the worse is when the food is tasteless. At least, you can put aside the gross foods but the bland foods you can eat will give you no satisfaction. Salt and pepper never fail, hot sauce or ketchup and mustard help too! You want to add as much flavor to your food as possible! Is the soup is too bland? Get some veggies and bacon from the salad area and dump it in. Your Mac-n-cheese not cheesy enough? Add shredded cheese and pop it in the microwave. Is there nothing good? Make yourself something with what is around you.
My system usually works but there will be days when just about everything sucks. If that’s the case, there is always the Campus Center.
